Toilet paper rolls, the right way.

First off, I'm a guy so that means I never really NEED to replace the toilet paper roll when it runs out. I'm sure you girls reading this will think that I'm some kinda sexist pig, but let it be known that guys don't need to use toilet paper as much as you do. Who do you think will be more bothered by not having toilet paper, the guy or the girl? Afterall, we guys have been known to use our own socks and underwear to wipe our own asses if there's no toilet paper around. Anyway, like most guys, I only need to use toilet paper to wipe my ass after I take a dump.

It's not like I need to wipe the piss off myself. Shit, even if I miss the toilet that badly, I could care less about having to wipe the mess up. And even if I end up pissing on myself, it'll dry up anyway so it's a wasted action to hafta wipe piss of myself anyway. The only time, besides taking a shit, I had to wipe myself was when I accidentally spit on my dick while I was pissing. If you're curious as to how that happened, I had been using mouthwash and decided to take a piss. And while taking a piss, I had tried to spit the mouthwash into the toilet and missed horribly. Let's just say I HAD to clean myself up because the alcoholic content found within mouthwash going down a guy's pee-hole isn't all that pleasant.

So what do I do if I run outta toilet paper while taking a shit? That's easy, I go take a shower. Of course, I just make sure no ssersfalls down on that bathroom rug located between the shower and toilet. I learned that it's a bitch cleaning shit off a fuzzy rug. It also doesn't help that I can't flip the rug over like a bed mattress during the time I was drunk and accidentally threw up all over my hotel bed and the girl I had been hooking up after some crazy party at an anime convention. And if you make it to the shower fine, I learned that the shower curtain works really well as toilet paper. And if you don't have a shower curtain, then you're shit outta luck.

For the times I do need to use toilet paper, I can't help but notice how annoying it is when the toilet paper roll was placed on its holster in the wrong fashion. Sure, call me anal, pun intended, but I can't stand it when toilet paper is replaced on its holder where the actual paper hangs down the back instead of the roll instead of the front.

It's so much easier to roll the toilet paper forward instead of backwards. Below are pictures of the right way and the wrong way to place the toilet paper on its holster. Keep in mind that, yes, I actually put the toilet paper on there. This is only a one time thing. I am willing to swallow my pride and actually replace the toilet paper for the sake of my readership.

Here is the right way: As you can tell, I don't live a privileged life. That's only one-play that you see.

Here is the wrong way: What sucks is that I had to turn the toilet paper back into its rightful place after I took this picture.

All in all, there is a right way and a wrong way to replacing toilet paper. Let's hope this rant will help teach all the women out there on how to correctly place the toilet paper on its holster ;)

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