Parodies of Kung-fu flicks, 'Bullet Time', and a 'Box of Chocolates' suck!
I was watching some television show recently, a show other than one found on the channels, History, TLC, or Animal Planet, and saw this scene where some actor parodies a kung-fu flick. You know what parodying I'm talking about. It's the one where the person moves their mouth as if their speech is out of synch with their lips. Of course, they do it in an exaggerated form. And what's messed up is that I could hear the audience laughing at that. I have one question. How can people STILL laugh at that!? It's like saying "Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side"! People are making fun of the way Chinese Kung-fu flicks are dubbed. Kung-fu flicks kick ass. There're like no movies that compare in fight sequences like that of kung-fu flicks. There are some fights that do kick ass, like Rowdy Piper and Keith David slugging it out in the movie, They Live. Unfortunately, there are far and few in between.
When I see people making fun of and laughing at the dubbing in kung-fu flicks, it pisses me off and I always find myself asking the question, "Jeez, hasn't the novelty of making fun of dubbing worn off yet?" Who knows, maybe these are the same kind of people that would do that 'There's something on your shirt' trick and hit you in the nose when you look down trick. Move on. Watching a guy doing something like that seems just as pathetic as Dave Coulier, who plays Joey in the television show 'Full House', doing his damn Bullwinkle impression. Both of them are NOT funny. Quit your parodying. It looks pathetic.
There are more novelties that have worn off but I still see it everywhere. For instance, 'Bullet Time', the infamous 'Matrix Effect' as people call it. You know what I mean, the of those scenes was of where Neo leans backwards to dodge a few bullets as the camera pans around him. How many people continue to make parodies or reference to that scene?! That scene sucks!! All it is is of Neo leaning backwards!! Fuck, he wasn't even dodging. The scene makes it seem like the Agent was missing shooting him instead of him dodging the bullets. It's just as pathetic as as seeing Trinity jump straight up to do that jump kick. WHO THE FUCK DOES SUCH MOVES?! Obviously, the cast of Matrix does. I'm sure you won't see that kinda jump-kick in kung-fu flicks. Anyway, I'm sick an tired of seeing those two moves used in so much shit. I see that damn lean-back bullet dodge everywhere. It's a pathetic move which seems to have been made 'cool' because of the 'Bullet Time' effect used to show it. Quit parodying these two moves since they are so stupid to begin with.
The point I'm getting at is that the moves used during 'Bullet Time' suck. Quit parodying shit.
Ever hear the saying 'Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get'? It's from the movie, 'Forest Gump'. Why do I hear that saying or parodies of it?! From my point of view, it's like going on a date with a supermodel and finding out she's a goddamn vegetarian....it fucking sucks! I know what the fuck kinda chocolates in the box! If I didn't I wouldn'tve bought it in the first place! Do I ever see anyone buying a box that says 'Mystery Chocolate' on the front of it? No!! That's because people wouldn't get it unless they knew what the fuck was in it!! They should change the saying to something like 'Life is like fucking a one dollar Thai hooker. You never know what you're gonna get'!
Man, seeing stuff like the 'Bullet Time' effect and the lampooning of kung-fu flick dubbings and the 'Box of chocolates' is like that of Pauley Shore, Steven Segal, and Jean-Claude Van Damme .....even though their novelty has worn off long ago, you'll still see them around.
I don't even know why I'm griping about all this. Even though the novelty seems to have worn off on those things from my perspective, it's obvious it hasn't for other people as they seem to continue to do such things and get reactions. I guess people believe in the saying 'If it ain't broke, don't fix it'. I guess it's a pretty good motto to go by. Afterall, we have multiple revisions of the Armored Core series and they're more or less the same. The same goes for the Dynasty Warriors series as well. I guess that's why my 'Just Won't Die' series is so long. Everyone, including myself, tries to squeeze blood from a stone. Damn, I'm such a hypocrite, I shouldn't be talking about 'novelty' when I have yet to realize that it had worn off long ago for my fanfic series.
Anyway, the parodying kung-fu flicks and 'Bullet Time' and 'Box of chocolates' are pathetic and the people that do it suck.